Dear Me.

You have scars strewn across your body that few others have seen. With every new one, you used to cringe at the state of your beauty. Remember that your scars are signs of strength. They each tell the story of a mountain you’ve climbed.

You’ve been through a lot. You’ve been pushed down in times of trying to move ahead more than you can count. But you’ve learned to push back. Give yourself credit for the fight.

You are not the man who created you. You may have his skin and stubbornness, but you do not carry his pain. Your heart and your spirit have been born again of a new Father, one who will never leave you.

You are a blend of kindness and sarcasm, good intentions and harsh words. You change your hair color with your mood and run away when someone does you wrong. Every once in awhile you smoke a cigarette and feel okay about it because you think that there are worse things you could do.

You carry songs in your mind wherever you go, and when others can’t see, your toes curl and tap to the rhythms inside. You wish you could show others the power of those songs through dance, but your body doesn’t move the way that it used to anymore.

You’ve grown up in a place where you never felt like you belonged. The first day you stepped off a plane in Florida, you realized those feelings were true. You long for porch swings and fireflies, gentleness and Southern twang. Don’t settle for the West just because it’s all you’ve known. Your heart belongs on another coast.

Be proud of yourself for going back to school. Not for anyone else, but for you. You deserve an education in that which you love most. It’s okay that it’s taken you longer to get to this place. You wouldn’t have felt the same about it back then.

Remember that when your heart breaks, His breaks with you. He does not let pain happen to you or put you through it. He wants more for you. He never leaves your side.

Learn to apologize before someone asks. Read more books and hold onto more words. Don’t shut people out when they don’t understand you—we are all messy. Be kind, even when it hurts, and God will take that hurt away from you. Yell and scream when you’re angry (you’re allowed), but don’t use that anger on others. Look in the mirror and tell yourself, out loud, that this is the most comfortable you’ve ever been in your own skin. Tell people you love them when you really do. Don’t waste your days wishing things were different.

Remember that you are not the lies that flood your mind late at night when your head hits the pillow. You are the hope that comes with the sunrise in those early hours when better seems possible.

And don’t ignore the dreams brewing inside your heart.

Love, yourself. [because sometimes we need our own words the most]